We often use the words of encouragement “love yourself first” when someone is going through an emotional turmoil. However, during those emotionally intense times, the idea seems more absurd than practical for those in distress – not because it is impossible to love oneself but because connecting with your best side at such points in life can be challenging.
As Muslims, we can take six steps towards self-care to love ourselves unconditionally – during good and bad times.
These include:
1- Take a Time Out to Assess Your Surroundings
It’s important to count your blessings, especially when it feels like nothing is going your way and you’re emotionally coming apart.
The Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) always advised his Ummah to look at those beneath them when going through hard times. So, rather than wasting your energy looking at those who, in your opinion, lead a better life, it could be an excellent time to humbly remind yourself of the many blessings Allah (SWT) has bestowed upon you and be grateful for them.
2- Gravitate Towards Prayers and Sunnahs
It’s impossible to love yourself without loving Allah and His Prophet Muhammad SAW first. Just like in sujood we find eternal peace as we call to Allah, following Sunnah mends our broken hearts and heals our damaged souls.
Say, [O Muḥammad], “If you should love Allāh, then follow me, [so] Allāh will love you and forgive you your sins. And Allāh is Forgiving and Merciful.” – (Al-Imran: 31)
3- Protect Your Heart – It’s a Gift
Your heart is a gift to you by Allah (SWT). In fact, all your pieces belong to the Almighty and to Him shall we all return. So, safeguard your heart from all evils and harms, protecting it at all costs so that you return with it to your Lord in the best way possible.
4- Utilize Your Time Doing What You Love
Another necessary step towards self-loving is doing what you love. While working for a living is an essential part of your life, carving some time doing things that make you happy is just as vital to connect with your true self.
5- Forgive Your Past-Self
Only you can save yourself from the damage that’s now a part of the past. Be it heartache, professional failure, or social disappointments, forgiving yourself is always the first step to getting yourself out of harm’s way and executing plans that actually make a difference and make you feel good about yourself.
6- Enforce Positivity
The next important step – “Believe that you’re worthy!” Use positive affirmations in your everyday life and remind yourself that it is Allah who has created you, and indeed, He is the best of Creators.
“We have certainly created man in the best of stature.” – (At-Tin: 4)
Bonus Point: Remember – Jannah Is the Ultimate Goal
Ultimately, the more you think of life as a temporary assignment and keep your focus on your ultimate goal - that is Jannah, the less likely you are to worry about worldly problems. Your mental sanity should always be more important than the problems that are meant to be short-term.
“And they rejoice in the worldly life, while the worldly life is not, compared to the Hereafter, except [brief] enjoyment.” – (Ar-Rad: 26)
